Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
I could fuck to npr.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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