i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
