Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
