Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Randomize
