apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize