hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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