do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize
