Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
