if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I can text with my tongue
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
nutella sex= disaster
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Randomize
