What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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