i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
