I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
