Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
