the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
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she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
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I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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