HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
organizing the empties. That sober.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
