I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
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