Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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