your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
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