I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that