I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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