I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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