is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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