just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I just gift wrapped bread.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
