Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
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