I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
