Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(586): View more from Michigan

Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy

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(571): View more from Virginia

is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?

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(417): View more from Missouri

He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.

(417): View more from Missouri

He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.

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(303): View more from Colorado

So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(626): View more from California

Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots

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(651): View more from Minnesota

we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers

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(510): View more from California

just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?

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(352): View more from Florida

I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.

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(205): View more from Alabama

Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.

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