You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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