I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
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