his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
