Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I wish my penis had an off switch
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Randomize
