Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
