I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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