bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
