tell your sister to shave her snatch
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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