Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
