Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
