hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
