Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
