I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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