i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize
