God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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