so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
