VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Randomize
