i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
