what if every blade of grass was a penis?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
You have to summon your inner elephant
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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