someone get that fucking seahorse.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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