my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
