Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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