my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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