Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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