I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize